Where am I (now / in ) 5 years time?



I was given this book in 2012; for my birthday by – shall we say – someone who was either having a sarcastic , nasty dig at me or was trying to believe they actually knew me.

Of course, if any of you out there know. This book is one of millions that are available to ‘help’all of us get motivated with our lives and stay on track type books.

It is full of interesting facts, quotes from famous people and strategies on how to get started.  AND , like most consumers, I read it, re read it and tried to ‘get started’on the next phase of my life.

What they do not mention is REAL LIFE ACTUALLY GETTING IN THE WAY.

For me that was the real fact that our mother was diagnosed with aggressive brain cancer, me giving up my management job to move 680 kms away; to a town I had not lived in for 30 years, no job because she needed 24/7 care, battling the red tape, medical system and generally trying to stay sane when she had 6-9 month to live.    Alas that last bit did not happen she outlived their stats. and stayed alive for the next 5 and half years.

I started using my meagre savings for every day living whilst we still traveled back and forth that 680 kms for medical treatment, visit the other kids /grand kids because they still had jobs and were too busy to get to see us much. 

Along the way Number 1 son got divorced, My father had a melanoma removed, and his 2nd marriage disintegrated, i was still reeling form my own personal relationship disaster from 18 mths beforehand.

What does one do about that when they are ”reaching for the stars”.  Setting goals, saving money, mending fences, writing up business plans, eating right etc. etc.

Ever the while reading how OPRAH, Steve Jobs, George Bush, Tim Robbins, Ernest Hemingway, Andrew Carnegie, and Roosevelt and their ilk made äll their dreams come true”.

Did I succeed?

In a small – yes very minuscule -way I did, kind of.  I did start blogging, I followed and still am following people I admire, I did try a change of diet and exercise routine BUT that fell back in to the usual half hearted attempts.

I tried to mend and repair some of my closest relationships ( i.e. mainly family) BUT when they would not even remotely met me part of the way I just stopped trying.

I went back to school and completed a diploma and a much needed certificate in workplace training. This was to show a future employer I was the person for them and their organisation. Although I am still not as employable anymore because I am too old and have been out of the workforce for too long.  Go figure.

I am still homeless – due to zero savings and inability to get a home loan in this crazy real estate world, I have (at least) kept on top of my debt;incurred over these years), own a car of my own( thanks to a small bequest from our fathers estate), re discovered my love of baking, reading and knitting.

So I did fail at many things from relationships to saving money, to eating right.  Hell the book even says you will do this.

So how do I feel?

I dislike the fact I cannot or could not match any of what this book was about.

So where were you 5 years ago?

Did you have hopes and dreams and were you able to convert any of them like the way this book proposes?


Me I am now considering where will I REALLY BE in 5 years time.


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